Understanding Body Language
Posted: Friday, September 04, 2009
by Seraphina Tan
SetupADaycare.com
More often than not, when we have just spoken/sold to a parent about our daycare services, we are left wondering if they will ever come back. According to one study, vocals (tone of voice, inflection and any other sounds) constitutes 38% of what a person is communication, verbal (words) 7% and body language (body language, posture, facial expression) 55%.
1. Bored
When the listener is bored, he will look at anywhere else except at the person who is talking. They might also perform repeat actions such as tapping toes, swinging feet or drumming fingers. The repetition may escalate as they try to signal their boredom. Some might start yawning or slouching and their facial expression will show a distinct lack of interest and appear blank.
Reasons for boredom stems from either pure disinterest or the sales person might have done too much selling. Sometimes, a client is ready to sign but the sale person continue with the lengthy sales pitch, totally missing the buying signal.
2. Closed
In a closed position, the listener will have one or both arms cross the central line of the body, either folded or tightly clasped or holding one another. The arm and/shoulders could be a relaxed droop or holding on to the body or other arms.
There can also be some crossing of the leg from the ankle cross, to the knee cross and the figure-four (ankle on opposite knee) and the tense wrap-around or the legs could be wrapped around some other objects such as the leg of a chair. In cases when the legs are crossed but arms are not, the listen is intentionally attempting to appear relaxed. The listener will either be looking down or looking away with the head either inclined away from the speaker or tucked down.
There can be a number of reasons for a closed body language. One reason could be because the listener could be feeling defensive or in need of some self nurturing. Sometimes, it could be because the listener is intending to hide something from the speaker such as his/her genuine feeling about the situation. Sometimes, it could simply be a physiological reaction. The listener could be feeling cold and is trying to keep warm. Other times, it could be because the listener is feeling genuinely relaxed and/or looking away from the speaker to think. It is therefore important to notice the transition when the body closes as an indication of the reason for the body closing.
3. Deceptive
When the listener is intending to intentionally deceive the speaker, a number of body languages will surface. He/she will demonstrate some anxiety or tension such as sweating, sudden movements, minor twitches of muscles (especially around the mouth and eyes), changes in voice tone and speed, biting the inside of the mouth, patting head and/or hands in pockets. Sometimes, when the listener is trying to deceive, he might overcompensate such as forced smiles (mouth smiles but eyes do not), jerky movements and clumsiness or alternating between open body language and defensive body languages. The listener might also appear distracted or hesitant because he/she is trying to cover up of thinking of an appropriate action.
There are a couple of reasons for a deceptive body language. The listener could either be trying to persuade the other party to do or say something or intentionally trying to cover up or avoid a question.
4. Evaluative
When a person is thinking, making a judgment or making a decision, he will demonstrate a number of body language. The hands could either be clasped together or interlinked or the finger could be stroking the chin or any other parts of the face. Alternatively, the body could be relaxed or open but the listener shows signs of concentration, perhaps with pured lips or an intense gaze.
There can be a number of reasons for the listener to demonstrate the evaluative body language. The listenser could either be deciding, thinking or judging about a particular decision. This means that the party if almost ready to close.
5. Open
When a person is open, his/her arms and legs are not crossed. The arms may be gesticulating and palm relaxed and expressive. The feet may point forward or to the side or at something or someone of interest. Eye contact is likely to be more relaxed and prolonged and the listener might loosen his/her clothing such as removing a jacket or loosening the collar.
There are number of reasons for opening. It could be that the listener is accepting what the speaker has said feels that the speaker is no longer a threat. In some cases, that could be an act of aggression with the listener ready for a fight. Alternatively, it could mean that the listener is pleading for mercy. Sometimes, it could simply mean that the listener is now relaxed and comfortable. Just like understanding a closed body language, it is important to notice the transition when the body opens as an indication of the reason for the body opening.
Remember that an effective study of body language will require an interpretation of a combination of signals and posture rather than an interpretation of individual action.
For more essential information and resources on starting a successful daycare business, please visit www.setupadaycare.com
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